you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
