i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
