I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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