Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
