think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
