The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
