My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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