lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
