The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
