There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
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