well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Come see our sink grown plant.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
