I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize