She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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