This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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