do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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