Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i already hear my dad disowning me
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
they're like a gay fantastic four
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
the night ended with taco bell and tears
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
