I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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