Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
