Your tits are I can't wait for
I don't think brook has ever known best
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize