I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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