Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
