He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
