you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
There's a naked man in my car right now.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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