We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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