"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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