Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize