dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
