Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
