i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
