If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
