i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
