Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize