doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
