At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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