That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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