you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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