We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize