we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
