Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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