she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you win again, gameday.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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