Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
