so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
