this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Randomize
