just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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