Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
