that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
