Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
How's work?
Spinning.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize