Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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