I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
