Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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