next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
